• Home
  • About Me.
  • Sociopaths/Narcissists
  • Halt who goes there? Friend or Foe?
  • My Beloved Grandfather: A True Story Of Connection From Beyond.
  • The Master Of Impression Management.
  • About Me.
  • Sociopaths/Narcissists
  • You Look Good In RED!
  • Up In Smoke!

Surviving A Disordered Mind.

~ Narcissists,Sociopaths,Psychopaths,Toxic relationships,MFB Commander

Surviving A Disordered Mind.

Category Archives: Sociopaths/Narcissists

Beware The Tear-A-Downers!

28 Tuesday Apr 2015

Posted by awareb4 in Disordered Minds/Individuals/Sociopaths/Narcissists

≈ Leave a comment

Always Beware A Tear A Downer,

Don’t Become A Frowner & Never Lose Your Power! 
Hmm but, we know this don’t we?
We’ve all met a person that brings you down. 
The naysayer, the truth slayer, the bait layer!
We’ve all been conned, duped, cheated on & lied too haven’t we.
But, what happens when the person your with, has always appeared to build you up.
I say ‘appeared’ because, that is the surface agenda. 
The subsurface is vastly different! 
I remember feeling a sense of obligation for staying with my disordered mind. 
Even when I knew I didn’t really want to!
I often felt guilty for seeing his flaws & I felt really bad when I judged him. 
I am not by nature judgmental in general but, I remember thinking, ‘Gee he’s very controlling of his family & I could not stand that!’ or, ‘He is really lazy & sloth like’ & ‘his lovemaking is very robotic’ &, ‘He’s not very attractive & needs to lose weight’ etc…
Then I would think, ‘Oh how awful am I & he might see me the same way??’ so, in order to reestablish my ‘high pedestal self’, I admonished these cruel thoughts & berated myself for being so shallow. I would hear myself saying, ‘who are you to judge Missy!’
I’m a really decent person, high values, trusting & loyal aren’t I?
I mean, my Disordered Mind told me constantly how awesome I was & I couldn’t let him down could I?
After-all, if he thinks so highly of me & my ability then, who was I to disappoint him.
So, I stayed trapped out of loyalty, obligation & because, he told me I am such a wonderful person.
This is the trap that Disordered Minds instill in you, the loyal Empath. 
They know by our own rationalizing, it will bring us back for more of their compliments & soothe sayings. 
Our Ego get’s the better of us &, our own Ego’s won’t let us become like them. 
We can’t deliberately hurt another without due provocation.
It’s like admonishing a child for being a little bit naughty but, overall good.
It is what they depend on. Our ability to let them get away with little indiscretions that slowly grow to bigger ones!
She/He is ‘too nice’ to do that. This was said to me on more than one occasion. 
‘Your too nice’, what’s ‘too nice’ mean? 
Translation is, your an Empath & being mean, deceptive & shallow is not your true nature.
You will always be predictably nicer than the Disordered Mind. Your preset for love & loving behavior.
So, even when we see their games, faults & even worse, we default back to the ‘Rise Above’, you are better than that.
We are gracious because, this is what we do & who we truly are.
If we lash out we are crazy & if we don’t we are weak. 
We are neither & each response is provoked by the Disordered Mind. 
It’s Fight or Flee on command.
For those that are targeted by a Disturbed Character/Disordered Mind, it’s normal to just Freeze & try to restore your natural balance. We conceptualise ourselves & our significant others.
I am good, I am & they know it & so do I! Why did it need his constant reinforcing over & over. Because, if I wasn’t built up, I couldn’t be torn down so, build up he did & subsequently the tearing down was inevitable, part of the plan. You fall hard & pretty much decimated. This is the intention of the character disturbed.  ‘Set Em Up & Watch Them Fall!’
Unfortunately everything I thought about him was true & came to pass.
He was a nasty character & that other women had the same thoughts too.
In hindsight, it would have been better if I had been honest with myself & cut & run when I started to see his true character. All those flaws that I did not like & value’s that weren’t aligned with my own. I don’t normally think in negative terms about my loved one’s, not like the way I did of his. I could ‘see’ his badness yet, felt obliged somehow to overlook them? Why, because I was ‘groomed’ professionally to accept the unacceptable. Subtle at first then, systematic acceptance of overlooking his behavior. I forgot I had a choice, I stopped noticing, I stopped caring & then I just stopped.
Alas hindsight is useless & I needed foresight to see & heed my own warnings & gut. This man was not for me, never was & never would be!
So yes, Beware The Tear-A-Downers but, watch carefully for the Builder-Up-Perers!
Beware your Ownself & your Ego, they are separate but, often meld together to confuse you.
teddy
Awareb4.
← Older posts
Newer posts →

Archives

Blogs I Follow

  • Let Me Reach with Kim Saeed
  • Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD
  • sobreviviendoapsicopatasynarcisistas
  • Kim Saeed: Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program
  • Self-Care Haven by Shahida Arabi
  • Free From Toxic
  • After Narcissistic Abuse
  • ChumpLady.com
  • Your Journey Begins Today
  • No Psychos, No Druggies, No Stooges
  • Avalanche of the soul
  • Dating a Sociopath
  • Aussie Criminals and Crooks
  • Musings from the Soul
  • Love. Life. OM. Blog
  • Psychopathyawareness's Blog
  • this is... The Neighborhood
Follow Surviving A Disordered Mind. on WordPress.com

Recent Posts

  • IT’S TIME TO STOP DOMESTIC ABUSE ONCE & FOR ALL! July 22, 2015
  • Beware The Tear-A-Downers! April 28, 2015
  • Narcissist Where? Why Have You Been All Of My Life! March 31, 2015
  • Dear Mr Mindfuckery, Character Disturbed, Sociopath, Narcissist,Psycho,Nutcase or wherever your DSM? January 31, 2015
  • Breathing is Forgiveness. January 13, 2015
  • Victorian MFB Fireman Who Couldn’t Put Out A Fire! August 18, 2014
  • The Masqquerade Ball. August 15, 2014
  • Daddy’s Little Girl. August 12, 2014
  • STAINED GLASS August 6, 2014
  • Stop Purring & Get Roaring! July 31, 2014
  • Emotional, Physical & Spiritual Fitness. July 28, 2014
  • Best in Show, The Grooming of the Other Women! July 21, 2014
  • Forget Me Not. July 11, 2014
  • My kaleidoscope Life more aptly titled CollideEscape! July 4, 2014
  • Thank you, Thank you, Thank you (sigh) Thank you! July 4, 2014
awareb4

awareb4

Welcome to my blog & thank you for stopping by. I am an ordinary layperson hoping to do something extraordinary by sharing my stories of life & love. I have had two long term toxic relationships plus, child abuse & a workplace sociopath so, am well experienced to emphasize with others that have suffered any type of abuse. I write of events & Impressions with mindfulness,understanding, kindness, gratitude & healing. I offer support for others with like minded intentions. I chose the 'Chateau' theme as, it reminds me of all the light & dark in our lives & how looking down the grand hallway with the light streaming in & the shadows seemed appropriate to my life & journey through this life.

View Full Profile →

Pages

  • About Me.
  • Halt who goes there? Friend or Foe?
  • My Beloved Grandfather: A True Story Of Connection From Beyond.
  • The Master Of Impression Management.
  • Up In Smoke!
  • You Look Good In RED!

Recent Comments

awareb4 on The Master Of Impression …
awareb4 on About Me.
@GeneticPsycho (Tina… on The Master Of Impression …
RO on About Me.
awareb4 on The Master Of Impression …
awareb4 on Dear Mr Mindfuckery, Character…
Michelle on Dear Mr Mindfuckery, Character…
GeneticPsycho on The Master Of Impression …
positivagirl on My Beloved Grandfather: A True…
positivagirl on My Beloved Grandfather: A True…
awareb4 on You Look Good In RED!
awareb4 on My Beloved Grandfather: A True…
awareb4 on My Beloved Grandfather: A True…
positivagirl on You Look Good In RED!
positivagirl on My Beloved Grandfather: A True…

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 36 other followers

Abusive Relationships Disordered Minds/Individuals/Sociopaths/Narcissists Manipulation & Control Sociopaths/Narcissists Uncategorized Victimaisation & targeting
May 2022
M T W T F S S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  
« Jul    

Blog Stats

  • 9,170 hits

Categories

Top Clicks

  • None

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Blog Stats

  • 9,170 hits

Tags

ABUSE Abusive Relationships Addictions Alison Bayden-Clay Cheats compassion Covert Abuse Deception. Disordered Minds Domestic Abuse Domestic Violence Emotional Violence empathy Freedom Healing healthy boundaries kindness. Lisa Harnum LOVE Lovers & Losers loyalty Manipulation. Mind Gaming NARCISSISTS Narcissists etc... Pathological Liars Reeva Steencamp RELATIONSHIPS respect Sociology Sociopath/Covert Narcissists Sociopaths Sociopathy/Narcissism Survival Targets. trust VIC MFB VIC MFB COMMANDER victimisation Victimization women

Meta

  • Register
  • Log in
  • Entries feed
  • Comments feed
  • WordPress.com

Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com.

Let Me Reach with Kim Saeed

Surviving Narcissistic Abuse | No Contact | Narcissists and Lying | Narcissistic Husband | Love Bombing | Cognitive Dissonance

Healing From Complex Trauma & PTSD/CPTSD

A journey to healing from complex trauma.

sobreviviendoapsicopatasynarcisistas

Hay vida luego de una relación con un vampiro emocional.

Kim Saeed: Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program

Self-Care Haven by Shahida Arabi

Free From Toxic

Blog Psychotherapy Workshops

After Narcissistic Abuse

There is Light, Life & Love

ChumpLady.com

Leave a cheater, gain a life!

Your Journey Begins Today

Recover and Empower yourself from Narcissistic Abuse

No Psychos, No Druggies, No Stooges

Let's get disordered people out of government

Avalanche of the soul

Escaping and surviving abusive relationships

Dating a Sociopath

The truth will set you free!

Aussie Criminals and Crooks

Australian criminals and their Crimes. Con artists, scum bags, murderers, corrupt cops, pollies, rapists and paedophiles will find themselves in this blog. It was expanded to also cover those that ought to be charged for their idiotic disgusting behaviour. Usually high-profile people who think they are above the law

Musings from the Soul

Writing for conscious living

Love. Life. OM. Blog

Wisdom of survivors of domestic violence, rape and fraud

Psychopathyawareness's Blog

information about psychopaths

this is... The Neighborhood

the Story within the Story

Privacy & Cookies: This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this website, you agree to their use.
To find out more, including how to control cookies, see here: Cookie Policy
  • Follow Following
    • Surviving A Disordered Mind.
    • Join 36 other followers
    • Already have a WordPress.com account? Log in now.
    • Surviving A Disordered Mind.
    • Customize
    • Follow Following
    • Sign up
    • Log in
    • Report this content
    • View site in Reader
    • Manage subscriptions
    • Collapse this bar
 

Loading Comments...